1. Introduction
Jealousy is a very important
emotion, but it's one that is often misunderstood. You see, jealousy can be a
great motivator to help you learn to feel more confident in your abilities, but
it can also be a negative emotion that holds you back from pursuing what you
really want.
Many of us have felt jealous at some
point in our lives. And though the feeling isn't always easy to deal with,
there's something about the experience that can make it more exciting and give
you a sense of accomplishment if you learn to overcome those pesky feelings.
Jealousy can be defined as an
emotion of intense desire for success and your own achievements. Jealousy is
also defined as the state of being overly concerned with something or someone
else's success or failure. The word envy comes from Old French which means
"to see" or "to look" and means "to covet."
2.
The Psychology of Jealousy
It’s not easy to be jealous. It’s
not the sort of emotion you can just brush off. You have to know why it
sometimes seems like a bad idea. I’ll tell you why:
The other day I was at a friend’s
place and he asked me if I wanted to go out for a drink or something with his
friends. My first thought was that I didn’t want to but then he told me he’d
already invited them over so I had no choice but to accept.
My second thought was that they were
friends of his girlfriend and they probably hadn’t even spoken since the last
time I saw him. But then my third thought was that maybe it wouldn’t be too
weird if we went for a drink together after all.
I had never been jealous before, but
now I knew exactly what it felt like. Even though there wasn’t anything wrong
with being friends with his girlfriend, being constantly reminded of her
whenever you thought about her seemed… odd? And if we spent time together, it
would be awkward because she would always be there when he wasn’t around, and
if she wasn’t there then he wouldn’t talk to anyone else.
So yes, jealousy is weird! But it is
also true! It can happen to anyone. Sometimes people feel jealous because they have
nothing else in their lives or because they want someone else more than they
want themselves right now (which is also weird!). You may feel jealous toward
your parents; toward your boyfriend/girlfriend/husband/wife; and even toward
yourself! Jealousy is normal. People feel jealous towards people they love,
sometimes even towards themselves at times like these! So if you begin feeling
jealous toward someone (even yourself!) don't worry about it now! Just learn
more about what feels good for you and make sure that person isn't making
anything out of this situation for the purpose of getting attention or money
from you — which could include manipulation — then move on with your life! But
if someone doesn't do any of those things, just relax and get back to work :)
3. What Is Social Comparison Theory?
The human brain is a very complex
organ. The parts that people perceive as our “self” are all interconnected in
the brain. Our self can be viewed as the sum of our memories, beliefs, and
values, not to mention our social identity (who we think we are) and
personality traits. We can't really know how all these factors relate to who we
truly are—it's just a collection of information that's constantly changing.
If you're like most people, you've
probably felt jealous at some time or another. Although jealousy isn't a
universal emotion, it's often one that is associated with specific emotions
such as anger, fear, and sadness. For example:
Jealousy: fear that someone else has
more than you do
Anger: hostility toward an
individual who causes you frustration
Sadness: melancholy about a loss or
failure in your life
Fear: anxiety about potential harm
to yourself or others
The human brain may be able to
recognize similar feelings from one person or situation to another but is not
always able to pinpoint exactly what those feelings are or why they may exist
at one time versus another. Social comparison theory (often abbreviated SCT) is
an important research area dealing with such issues and other related topics
including envy and related feelings (e.g., greed). People tend to evaluate
their own strengths against those of others who they perceived as having more
than them when there may be no disparity between these two groups; however,
when there is a disparity between these groups, the comparison process results
in an emotional response of envy which leads to negative feelings such as anger
and sadness. Social comparison theory invokes three main perspectives:
One perspective assumes that people
evaluate their own abilities by comparing themselves with reference groups;
this perspective was developed by psychologists who were trying to understand
how individuals were able to come up with a sense of self-worth from little
information provided by other people. The second perspective assumes that
individuals evaluate their capabilities by comparing themselves with reference
groups; this perspective was developed by social psychologists interested in
studying how individuals could identify with others based on shared characteristics
in order for them to feel connected with others through social exchanges. The
third perspective assumes that individuals evaluate their ability independent
of reference group; this perspective explains the mechanisms behind how
individuals can relate socially based on their own experiences. One theory of
social comparison theory describes it using socially relevant parameters (e.g.,
gender roles), item characteristics (e.g., academic achievement), trait
dimensions (e.
4.
Why We Feel Jealousy
Jealousy is a feeling of insecurity
or fear that arises when we sense our partner has someone else’s attention or
affection.
In the case of jealousy, this can be
in the form of a feeling of inadequacy, fear, and anxiety about limited
resources or security. Jealousy can have one or more negative emotions such as
anger, resentment, inadequacy, helplessness, or disgust.
Jealousy frees us from being kept in
a box where we are expected to look perfect at all times because we want to
make sure that no one ever takes the place of our partner in what is important
to us.
5.
How to Deal With Jealousy
Jealousy is an emotion that we tend
to experience whenever our needs are not being fulfilled. It is a feeling of
inadequacy, insecurity, or anxiety and can be experienced when we fail to
obtain something that we desire for ourselves.
Jealousy can have several negative
feelings such as anger, resentment, inadequacy, helplessness, or disgust.
Jealousy also has one or more positive feelings such as excitement and
attraction. Jealousy can also be felt as fear of losing something that you have
and need. We may feel jealous of what others possess in the way of material
resources (money, love), emotional support (affection), personal power
(authority), or social status (honor).
The emotions we experience towards the object of jealousy are the same feelings that we experience when someone does something wrong to us: anger, frustration, sadness, and sorrow. Fear is one way that jealousy can play into a situation where our needs are not being met; it is simply an unhealthy feeling which should not be indulged in.
6. Conclusion
Jealousy is a natural human emotion.
It centers on the desire to be recognized by someone else as worthy of being
noticed and being treated as special. It is a feeling of insecurity, one that
stems from feelings of inadequacy because we are naturally afraid we do not
measure up in comparison to other people. We wish we could be better than
others. But the fact remains, when it comes to our own self-worth, there are
only so many more people out there that can measure up to us in comparison.
So like all emotions, jealousy is an
appropriate response if it serves a beneficial purpose and its use doesn’t harm
anyone else or violate any other normal rules of social interaction.
Jealousy may seem irrational but it
is important to remember that jealousy has been around since the beginning of
time and has provided us with valuable insight into the behaviors of our animal
cousins when it comes to reproductive strategies and mate choice.
By: Mahpara Nazeer
The writer is a teacher at Ruzhn Academy Bugh Meeri
0 Comments
Post a Comment